Cacoxenite In Fluellite
Cacoxenite In Fluellite
A magical cabin converted from a watermill by a Serbian painter whose father owned and operated many mills along this Bosnian river.
Contributed by Brian Portolano.
St. Mary’s Basilica, Kraków
The look of admiration.
I know. That food looks amazing. She bout to smash
GIRLS AGAINST CAT CALLING 2014
it sucks how much people don’t consider #alcohol or #drugs in a space when thinking about accessibility or advertising their event as a “safe(r) space” like if people are going to be drinking or using there, it is not safe for me. it is not accessible to me. and not only that, but it’s not safe for non-addicts too because people are more likely to do/say fucked up shit and cross boundaries etc etc when theyre intoxicated.for real though like there’s nowhere in philly I know of like that other than my house (where we’ve had one show). and it fucking sucks and i need spaces like that and i don’t go anywhere or hang out with anyone in this city other than my roommates and that’s it. ugh.
yeah seriously. i would have had a much less dangerous and isolated time while getting sober if this was remotely considered by most
i was on google “street view” for less than a minute and i accidentally came across a huge pile of trash, my friend’s squat, and unrelated ex’s friends’ tags
i will miss living in a place that is familiar
but only a little
9 days till move
Okay I’m finally answering this. I hope you’re still around to see it, sorry for the delay.
Now, I’m gonna be nice about this ultimately, but first things first: don’t come to the people you oppress with how bad you feel about oppressing them. A function of systems of oppression is that oppressor groups exploit the labor of oppressed groups, and what you’re doing when you come to a woman about how you feel bad about your position in patriarchy is using her as emotional labour to assuage your guilt, which is ultimately just recreating the conditions of patriarchy. So yeah, in the future if you feel the need to vent about the harm maleness causes as a system and your positionality in it, etc, I would suggest talking to a male friend you have who might be inclined to understand (if you have one). Like, I sometimes worry about my position as a white woman within white supremacy, but I keep it to myself generally and I definitely do not go to the women of color I care about and expect them to do the emotional labour of tending to my white guilt. So yeah, I’m excusing you here but avoid it in the future.
So, now, it’s obvious that you do have concern for women or else you wouldn’t be expressing this sentiment. Ultimately, it’s not my job as a woman to rehabilitate your masculinity, but I am willing to give you some advice/my perspective at least. Basically, within our sex-gender-sexuality system (cisheteropatriarchy) the male class exploits the female class, and the entire raison d’être of manhood is to exploit women. That is the purpose of patriarchy, that is why it was “founded” so to speak, so gender cannot exist as it does in patriarchy without explicitly being an exploitative system. So, I would say all masculinity is ultimately toxic masculinity as a result, because masculinity can only exist under patriarchy by virtue of sublimating feminity. However, the level of toxicity can vary from man to man. While all men are complicit in patriarchy, I do believe that it’s possible try and actively exist in a way that attempts to struggle against patriarchy. I’m skeptical as to the idea that men make the choice to be men, really; I think “male socialization” aka subjectivization as a man is an involuntary process of internalization that happens at a young age and possibly permanently alters a man’s sense of subjectivity and consciousness. So I wouldn’t say you should resist your manhood, but rather do your best to articulate it in the least toxic way possible. So: don’t use misogyny to reinforce your masculinity, don’t cosign rape culture, call out other men when they are misogynistic, listen to and believe the women in your life, etc, etc. You’ll slip up at times inevitably but just do everything you can to actively struggle against patriarchy, both as it exists outside you and as you have internalized it. Also, given your unique position of privilege within the trans community qua being CAFAB/a man, defend, protect and stand up for trans women. Call people out on transmisogyny, don’t use women only spaces, listen to trans women, etc.
So yeah, basically use your privileged position as best you can to not be oppressive, basically. Be good to women. Men who are neutral towards patriarchy ultimately stand with it, so actively make it a goal in your life to struggle against that system. Learn to be a good feminist ally. You obviously already have concern for women, but it seems like you’re caught up in male guilt right now. Guilt is not a particularly constructive emotion. Try to move beyond it. That’s all I can say.
Also, with regards to the dysphoria you obviously experience, I don’t know what you’re on or what you’ve done, but if you haven’t then maybe seek out transition? I think because we live in a cissexist society, trans people ultimately will always have to grapple with dysphoria if they have it, but HRT, top surgery, bot surgery, etc. can do a lot to mitigate dysphoria. Good luck with that and I hope you can find a way to feel better about your body.
So yeah, sorry it took me so long to get to this and I hope this was helpful.